Taking care of myself, first. Or why I hate the hospital

One of my worst nightmares this week came true. I got hospitalized, complete with the dreaded IV.

The hospital and I have a long-standing hate feud that has been going on since 2001. Even on the joyous occasions of the birth of my two children, I couldn’t wait to blow that popsicle stand at the earliest opportunity. 

The hospital reminds me I’m human. It reminds me that I’m doing, worrying and stressing about too much.  My health takes on this great importance. An importance I don’t usually feel about it.

Usually, my health is at the bottom of the list in my world. I have two young kids and a furry friend to take care of. I try to help my husband where I can. I work. I plan outdoor adventures. I cook. Eventually, I may get to taking care of myself. Mostly it doesn’t happen and I just keep going. 

In the last few months, the truth is that I was struggling on taking time out for myself. Making mom moments for mental and physical health. I started to do it once a week as a place to start. Strong women around me that I dearly adore begged me to make this more of a priority.

It wasn’t enough my hour. It wasn’t a priority. Now it shows.

You have to slow down in the hospital. Suddenly nothing is on your watch. You’re waiting for everyone. No one seems to have the answers you’re looking for. You have to put the pieces together yourself.

The pale walls close in a little on you. The smells aren’t exactly comforting, and you wait. Then you wait longer. This is usually the point where I’m ready to rip the IV out of my arm and stroll out.

I’m writing this out to remind myself and other busy moms like me :

We have to take care of ourselves first, and the hospital shouldn’t be the place you slow down.

Find Your Why

We all have this reason WHY we need to slow down. WHY we need to make a health a priority. Without our health, we can’t do anything. Nothing. Nada. Nilch. Zip.

So why is health important? Our well-being affects others – we affect our kids, our spouses and partners, and our families. So many studies have shown how parents who are stressed have impact on the rest of the family. Our kids are looking to us as role models, and those little sponges take in everything. 

And if you’re thinking like me that this is self-care is selfish. It’s not. What’s selfish is putting your family and friends through health crises. That is just more stress.

My Why

The why for me is simple. It looks like my family.

They shouldn’t have to go on without me. I don’t want them missing my hugs, kisses or I love you’s any days! I want to be their healthy role model. I want to play outside with them in the snow, and sun.

So knowing that, I’m stepping forward to be my own best advocate. To seek the answers. To do what I have to even when it’s not pretty. I don’t want to miss any of those days. They are just too precious to me to miss.

You know what, my husband of mine is going to remind me of this post. I just know it. He’s got my back that way.

I’m challenging you too – why should you health be a bigger priority? Who’s counting on you?